Mother's Day

My two Mother's Day gifts were perfect:

1. A kid-free morning to volunteer at the Big Lake Half Marathon. Thought it was gonna pour but it was quite warm and humid and the black flies were ridiculous. BUT, I loved cheering on the 1,000+ amazing runners. I particularly loved cheering on the handful of friends I knew on the course. I was marshaling at mile 3.5... which turned into mile 11 after they did a loop... so I had a great time.

2. When I got home my husband presented me with gift number 2: the garage fridge stocked with beer and wine. (Lately we have always been out of any adult beverages at the precise moment one would have really hit the spot.) What can I say? He knows me!

On another note.... I am going to gun for a BQ at the October 6th Rockfest Marathon in Hampton, NH. Flat and fast, they say. Here's hopin' this old girl can make it happen. Training officially starts in June by my brain is already obsessing.

Happy Mother's Day, moms. Not an easy day for so many, but I hope all your maternal thoughts are happy and hopeful ones. Most days I take my Mom and my Momhood for granted. I will try not to... for tomorrow, anyway!

Me and my sign. A nice fella from a local running club was taking photos. And no, I was not going for 'sexy' with the off-the-shoulder blaze orange vest. I just ooze sexy naturally, obviously.

Task avoidance: PT Day 2

I have a boatload of work to do for a church committee I am on, but I logged on to the computer and remembered that I hadn't posted about my second round of PT yet. So, here's to avoiding some writing.

The PT guy agreed with my idea to do a run just before my appointment today so that I'd be warmed up when I got there. With that in mind, I ran my easiest, flattest and fastest 3 miles in ages this morning just  before my appointment. His facility, in addition to being super cool and filled with a truck load of intriguing looking torture devices PT equipment, is just steps away from Cotton Valley Trail. This is literally the only flat running place in a 50 mile radius. Well, not counting the track. I was pretty pleased to feel the need to hold the reins tightly on this run. It has been so long since I've run with any kind of speed, I was truly tempted to let 'er fly. I still clocked the last mile at about 8:37. Not fast but certainly not the plodding speed I have been going.

It was another educational session. He taught me a couple of strength training moves to do with a resistance band. These are meant to increase the strength in my glutes, thus helping me stay away from Dead Butt Syndrome. This YoutTube link shows you the "monster walk" (though he had me put the band around my ankles as opposed to just below the knees). After a few minutes (or, for me, about ONE minute) this thing really starts working the hips (or, 'side ass'). His warning to me was to NOT overdo this and to NOT do this just before a run, as it will fatigue the  muscles and probably make you change your gait - thus, making you prone to injury.

The other exercise he didn't name so I can't give you a link. Basically, you stand with the band around your ankles, balance on one leg and pull out with the other leg at different angles. The muscles you are working should actually be in the leg on which you are balancing, not in the leg that is doing the pulling. Once you get the hang of it, you are also supposed to work your upper body into it by bending over, as if you are picking things up. This is also an exercise to be done POST run, not pre-.

We also reviewed the stretches he gave me the other day and had me show him 'how I roll'. Well, how I foam roll. I must have done it okay because his only advice was that when I found a tender spot to 'breath through it'.

He did another round of ultrasound on the tendon. This time he cranked the level a little and I definitely felt some, uh, action. This was comforting, actually, as the small amount of pain helped me feel like there was something going on in there. Healing, hopefully!

Finally, he massaged the muscles in my quad a bit, retaped my leg and I was on my way.

Another good session. Another BEAUTIFUL day out and about my boys this afternoon. I am in denial that we have to go back to school next week. What's the deal with me not being independently wealthy anyway? Humph.

Little Man loves the swing! And he kept his hat on today!

We are in for years bad family photos... And yes, my middle kid is wearing an orange shirt and a red hat. He's got the fashion sense of his mother.

Wa-wa

My Tweet this morning:

I wanna be the Helen Keller to this PT guy's Annie Sullivan. Without all the throwing of food... #GottaHeal #GottaQualify #BostonMarathon

Yes, I had my first day of PT today to see what we can do about my knee problem. I would not say we got Miracle Worker results, but it's early yet.

Kevin, the PT, was completely awesome. I estimated to Scott that the appointment would be about 30 minutes, 45 if I was lucky. I got about 90 minutes of his undivided attention. WOW! Among other notes:

• I was video taped on the treadmill so he could analyze my gate (stay tuned for the that) 

• He put kinseo (sp?) tape on my leg (my beach volleyball skills immediately went through the roof, and if you didn't watch Misty May-Trainer and Kerry Walsh in the 2012 Games, nevermind)

• I had each of my legs measured to see if they were the same length (they are technically the same, though something about the way I walk makes the right one shorter)

• I made a joke ("Well, I wouldn't be surprised if they are not the same length, my parents are first cousins.")

• He made a joke. ("Good news. They are the same length. Must be second cousins.")

• I had my legs bent and my leg strength tested in some bizarre angles. (Felt super wussy during this phase of things but good ol' Kevin did not call me a Pansy or anything.)

• I had Ultrasound therapy, an explanation for which I have lifted from ehow.com because I wasn't sure what it was:

Knee pain can be caused by a large number of factors that include the following; arthritis, tendinitis, bursitis, torn cartilage, torn ligament, strains or sprains, connective-tissues disorders (e.g., lupus) and knee injuries (dislocation of the kneecap). Ultrasound therapy is an approved physical therapy treatment used by doctors, physical therapists and occupational therapists to help reduce and/or eliminate your knee pain by sending high frequency sound waves, which provide deep heat, to your affected knee tissues and stimulate the healing process.
Read more: Ultrasound Therapy for Knee Pain | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/about_5571145_ultrasound-therapy-knee-pain.html#ixzz2REs8veku

• It's looking like I have tendinitis (I don't know the name of the tendon. He said it but it was more than 4 letters long so it went out of my brain). 

• The treatment is very specific stretches for my quad and hip flexor 2-3 times a day. (He gave me a print out of how to do the stretches, thank heavens.) This trick to this is to get the stretch without stressing the knee. Not simple.

• He also recommends foam rolling "everywhere". (I assume this means everywhere on my body, and not everywhere in the world. That might take awhile).

• He said my hamstrings are actual quite good/flexible... for a runner.

• I am okay to run as long as I can handle the pain. (I ran another hilly 3-miler with the stroller this afternoon... 3 is definitely as far as my knee wants to go for now)

• I have 2 more appointments this week in which he will go over his analysis of my gait and give me some strength exercises. (He agrees that I probably have a bit of Dead Butt Syndrome. Maybe I have MOSTLY Dead Butt Syndrome, like a character is The Princess Bride might have.)

So, I am feeling pretty good about this. We have a glorious week off from school/work, so I can sleep in not worry about rushing out in the mornings. In fact, when I got home from the run this afternoon, Scott had dinner going on the deck. I had the luxury of stretching and foam rolling out in the sunshine, on the deck, boys playing in the yard, baby toddling around my legs, and a beer within reach. Life is very, very good!

Gabe and me post-hill conquering. Slow pace, short distance. Still, I'll take it!

My beach volleyball leg, yoga mat, foam roller, running buddy and sunshine.

This is a camping kitchen my parents gave us for Christmas. Shame to keep it in the garage and use it just a couple of times a year, so we use it on the deck. So good to have spring!

P.S. While Kevin didn't endorse my chosen method of self-treatment (copious amounts of wine, chocolate, and self-pity/loathing), he didn't dismiss it either. For now I think I am going to incorporate both his and my methods of rehab into my life. 

Confusing math

Pretty sure my husband and I are both human. So, how is my child aging in dog years?

He is 9 tomorrow but I'm 100% certain I've only aged a year - two tops - since he was born.

What a Way to Know

(So many amazing things have already been said and written on this topic. I add my own noise to the mix merely for my own cathartic purposes. I am no Peter Sagal. I am no Jon Stewart or Stephen Colbert. I am no Jeannie Page. But, ya know, read on if you wanna!)

My knee is still being a jerk. Actually, my entire right leg is protesting any athletic endeavor I might attempt. Heck, it's even rebelling against the very UN-athletic endeavor of sitting on my butt for longer than a few minutes at a time. Nevertheless, I had to get out there for Boston today. The plan was to get up at 5:15 and see what the early morning had in store for me. But, GABE's plan was to get up at 5AM and keep me in the house with him.

Thankfully, we had an incredible spring day today, the big boys had karate, and Scott was able to pick them up when it was over. So, I scooted home, got on my running clothes and headed out with Gabe in the stroller. We live in a horrible place for jog strollers. (Read: no sidewalks, questionable road shoulders, windy and hilly roads around which drivers can't see too well....) So, I took Gabe out to the paved, barely driven upon, but very very hilly private road behind our house. It's 1.6 miles to a dead end and back. We did it twice. It was not so pretty. But... it's the farthest I've trekked since the Eastern States 20 in late March. We'll call it a win.

Happy baby, happy Mama. Don't ask about the knee.

The other great thing about getting out there today was the opportunity to think about how blessed I am with the path my life has taken so far. In the spouse-kids-friends-job spectrum, I am very much in the feel good end of the rainbow. I am frequently bemoaning the fact that I still don't know the answer to "what color is my parachute?" Maybe my parachute isn't meant to be one color. Maybe I need to get comfortable with that.

But, of course, most of my thoughts (aside from "GOD, my knee hurts" and "WHY does this baby keep tossing his sun hat out of the stroller?") were of Boston. I pondered how, before Monday, I almost always did a mental eye roll when talking to non-runners about marathon running. This is completely unfair, I realize, because you could fill 26.2 miles with the things I don't know about what other people enjoy doing: Crafts. Cycling. Pottery. Needle point. Scuba diving. I can't NOT think of things I don't know about. (What?) But, still, a mental sigh and patient explanations are fairly common when someone finds out I run.

For instance, people don't know how many miles are in a marathon. "How far is your marathon?" is a not-so-infrequent question I have heard. OR, they think that any running race is called a marathon... Believe me, once you run one, you never confuse say, a 10K, with a marathon!

Another honest inquiry I get is "Do you think you are going to win the race?" I guess that question makes sense for non-runners. You don't join a softball or bowling league fully understanding and mentally prepared for the eventuality that you will come in 5,679th place. But, running is different. And running marathons is even different-er.

And of course there is the inevitable "Aren't you going to wreck your knees?" On the advice of my attorney, I choose not to answer that question right this second..

Marathons, of course, are a unique pursuit. The world is starting to understand this. They are watching their televisions and understanding that marathon runners and their ilk don't run 'against' each other. Even the elites, who stand to win or lose a good chunk of prize money and lucrative endorsements based on their finishing place train together, support each other, and celebrate for each other.

Somewhere in the coverage I have heard (this has been an event I have almost exclusively 'watched' on the radio) a commentator said, "Remember, there is no one 'boo-ing' at a marathon." This was such an 'ah-ha' for me. No wonder I love running races. It's like being on stage where you know you'll always have a positive reaction, particularly if you are like me and look quiet spectators in the eye and demand some crowd lovin'! And it's no wonder I am so averse to attending college and professional sporting events. The trash talk from fans literally makes my stomach hurt.

The world is also learning specifically about Boston's greatest race. The tough qualifying standards. The easy-first-half, killer-second-half, point-to-point course through some of the most historic places in our country. The world is learning that marathoners are the kind of people who train for months and months (and sometimes for years and years) for the privilege of being part of this storied event.

And because of the placement of the explosives, people now know - and likely won't ever forget - that a marathon is 26.2  miles.

I am glad people have a better understanding of what a marathon is and what kind of people sign up for the torture/honor of running one. But I'm so very, gut wrenchingly horrified at the reason for their education.

Safe and Sound and Thankful for Fate

The end first: unplanned pregnancies and broken arms save lives.

Like many runners who weren't in Boston today, I spent a good chunk of my day thinking about the marathon. I was wishing I was there. I was able to watch chunks of the live coverage on the BAA website and check on the progress of people I knew who were running. The weather was amazing. My friend Lauren was, despite her recently busted up arm, keeping a great pace.

In the chaos of getting out of the house this morning, I left my cell phone home so I wasn't able to text Lauren my good wishes along the way. Instead, I sent her a series of emails that I knew she would get after the race. They went like this:

10:22 AM: Just watched your wave start… Didn’t see you but SO excited to know you are doing it RIGHT NOW!

10:58 AM: You ran your first 5K at 8:21. Wowza! I’m sure you are getting this eons after your finish. But you know, I am living it NOW!

11:23 AM: Way to go! Your 10K pace is great, too! 8:34 I hope you are enjoying it all and soaking up the adoration of the fans!!

11:45 AM: You are so totally rocking this race. Wish I was there! 8:32pace at 15K. You are so freaking amazing!

12:26 PM: Your half marathon time is fabulous! I am annoyed that I have to go work lunch duty and I can’t keep an eye on you! GO GO GO!

1:07 PM: You just  passed 30K and I can totally feel your pain. (Well, not really, but I can imagine it!) You’ve got this. You are STRONG!

1:58 PM: Oh, baby. I can only imagine how you are feeling just this very second! I hope your systems are going strong and you are feeling the energy of the crowd. YOU ROCK and YOU ARE BADASS!

2:21 PM: Way to go, Lauren!! I can’t believe you finished the Boston-Freakin’-Marathon just weeks after a broken arm. So happy for you. Hope you are consuming copious amounts of delicious food and feeling wonderful about your blazing pace. Yaaaay team!

Obviously, all this seems trivial now. Just a half hour or so after I wrote that last message... and just FIVE minutes after Lauren left the finish area, all hell broke loose. 

I learned about the tragic events just as we were pulling into karate around 4PM. Without my cell phone, I was stuck without a way to check in with Lauren and get updates. I caught pieces of the news from the AM station that was playing in the weight room of karate and it kept sounding worse and worse. And of course, it was.

When I got home I rushed to my phone to call Lauren. Of course, there was no cell service going in or out of Boston. Then I texted her and checked her FB page. Smart girl, she posted an "I'm okay" message. 

Then I started reading all the Facebook posts about the marathon. Many of my friends and family wrote to me to say that even though they knew I wasn't there, they were thinking of me. My sister wrote on my wall: "More than thankful for Gabe today... xoxoxo." Huh? It took me a minute to get it.

She realized before I did that Gabe was probably the main reason I wasn't running the race today. The summer of 2011 I was on FIRE, running-wise. I was healthy, I was motivated. I was poised to PR in a fall marathon.  I was going to qualify and run Boston. And, of course, my finish time would almost assuredly have been about the time of the explosions.

But then there was a night of an anniversary and maybe a bit more wine than is advisable.... And then there was Baby TOP - Totally On Purpose. 

Of course, so many factors could have changed the events. I may not have ever qualified for Boston. If I did, I may have decided not to run. Or I may have run in 2012 (the year of 6 billion degree weather). But, with Baby TOP (Gabe), all that speedy, hardcore running went on hold. No qualify. No run. No being in harm's way.

Likewise, Lauren's  broken arm may have saved her family from being hurt. They had originally planned to all make the trek to Boston for the race. Her husband and boy-girl 9-year-old twins would have been waiting for her at the finish line. 

But, she broke her arm in February. Boston was off. The trip was cancelled. No husband and kids at the finish line. 

And as we know, she rocked her recovery and made the trip to Boston anyway, but it was too late to make arrangements for the whole family to join her.

So, if you're ever not sure why things happen that disrupt your path, wait awhile. Maybe a few months. Or maybe 9 months + one year. And maybe you'll never know. But try to remember, there's certainly a reason.

I am wearing my marathon shirt to work tomorrow.

Injured runner shame spiral

I have self-diagnosed with many physical maladies, but this morning as I lay in bed was the first time I have self-diagnosed a mental health issue. I needed to get up and move. I needed to do some yoga, some strength training. I needed to sweat and tire out my muscles in a way that wouldn't bother my $(;&" knee.

But I just lay there. I was so cozy and warm in my self pity. (Don't deny it: you've wrapped yourself up in the same fuzzy blanket at times, too!) What I wanted I couldn't have. I wanted to run.

Ya see, on Monday I tried the elliptical for an easy 30 minutes and by afternoon my knee was killing me. Plus I'm still battling bizarre pains in my hip and lower back.

It's possibly, ever-so-slightly, that I may be blowing things out of proportion. Who ME!?!

Tomorrow will be better. Not because I am suddenly cured or self-motivated. It will be better because of this email exchange from my gracious and understanding BRF (best running friend):

Me: I am in an injured runners shame spiral... I could totally get up and do strength training, yoga, etc. and all I do is lie in bed and mope about not running. Could you kick me in the ass, please!?

BRF: Ok, yeah. You need to get your ass moving. You have worked too hard to get your fitness level where it is. Yoga will help mind, BODY and soul. Do it. Lift some weights while you are at it, or use your body weight. Planks are your friend. Strong core....good. :-) how's that?

So, now I will feel obligated to her to get up and move tomorrow. I think that has been the missing ingredient. Here's hoping anyway!